Lead us into frustration

Not a psalm quite yet

“You seem to keep running up against insurmountable situations” she said

“I used to think God wouldn’t frustrate us” I said 

“Maybe we need more psalms” she said 

“I want Olivia not to be dead” I thought

“Please God let the carnage end” I prayed

“There is so much arrogance and greed and fear and hatred behind it all” I lamented

“I want to sit in peace, not just my own, but for everyone” I whispered 

“It is the burden of the elders to carry the suffering of the world” she said

I must be getting old then 

Our Father, who art in the blood soaked and bomb shattered heaven, what the hell is your name? 

Your Kingdom come because sweet Jesus we’ve made a mess of ours, your will be done because this sure as shit can’t be it. 

Give them today their daily bread, our barns can’t hold any more. 

Forgive. Us. All of us. All of it. I can’t promise we’ll forgive, I know we must, but, well, you know. But you always go first, show us the way. Once again. 

Lead us into frustration so we can keep moving. 

For yours is only light at the end of this endless tunnel and yours is the only source that gives us a chance and when it all wraps up, you’ll be the only one standing.

Amen.